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In Rheingold the gods don't ascend into Valhalla, they go down into the basement. In Walküre, Siegmund doesn't pull the sword out of a tree (there isn't any), but from Sieglinde's bodice, and it is embarrassing to watch the two of them, with flailing arms and legs, in simulated coupling on top of a table. The Valkyries are high-heeled tarts with paper wings, and occasionally during Ride of the Valkyries what looks like a mummy (representing a fallen hero) is dragged across the stage. At the end of this opera Wotan doesn't look at Brünnhilde except via a TV set (which he operates with a remote) -- even though she is right in front of him on the upper stage level. There's no "magic fire" except for five small candles which she lights herself. In Siegfried, after watching Mime masturbate in scene three of act one, the hero (who has "Sieg Fried" printed on his T-shirt) discovers Brünnhilde in what appears to be a kitchen which happens to have a bed in it. As both are not small singers, it is rather comical to watch their mating ritual, reminiscent of a PBS nature documentary.
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